Chelsea Lately on Robert Pattinson: “That’s Too Much Hair for One Woman!”

Chelsea Lately June 12 , 2009
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Check out this hilarious video of the panel at Chelsea Lately discussing Robert Pattinson. It seems the gals are a bit at a loss for words, but the bald fellow at the end is spot on with the heartfelt and hilarious commentary!

--Kitzie

Source: http://www.newmoonmovie.org/2009/06/chelsea-lately-on-robert-pattinson-thats-too-much-hair-for-one-woman/

True Blood vs Twilight: Can the Vampires Peacefully Coexist?

With the HBO Southern gothic vampire series True Blood starting its new season tonight, Interview magazine recently caught up with the stars of True Blood to ask what they thought of the Twilight vamps–

Can the vampire universes of True Blood and Twilight peacefully coexist?

I don’t know…I think maybe the True Blood vampires would be jealous of the Twilight vampires for being so sparkly and shiny in the sun…they are the supermodels of the vampire world…and I think that we have all seen that supermodels and humans have difficulties with peaceful coexistence…a la the Naomi episodes.

What would a rumble between the two casts look like?

I think it would a little like the rumble in West Side story…with lots of hair product and fancy dance numbers and lots of hot men! And Yes I think the True Blood Vampires would definately crush the sparkly Twilight Vamps, without question.

--Kitzie

Source: http://www.newmoonmovie.org/2009/06/true-blood-vs-twilight-can-the-vampires-peacefully-coexist/

Robert Pattinson in NYC Last Night - The Video

Here’s a video of Robert Pattinson strutting down the street in NYC from last night–it’s nice to see him without the hoodie!

Kitzie's Note: SERIOUSLY ROB?!! A BASEBALL CAP???? Ugh. You look way hotter in a Fedora or something..but you still look amazing (when didn't you?!)

--Kitzie

Source: http://www.newmoonmovie.org/2009/06/robert-pattinson-in-nyc-last-night-the-video/

Jasper Hale + Spongebob: The Need for Bella’s Blood

If that title sounds confusing, well just watch the video–someone took some audio from Spongebob Squarepants, and put it with video of Jasper and his fight against wanting Bella’s blood during the papercut scene in New Moon. The result? I can guarantee you’ll watch this twice!

--Kitzie

Source: http://www.newmoonmovie.org/2009/06/jasper-hale-spongebob-the-need-for-bellas-blood/

Parody of Kristen Stewart and Robert Pattinson Interview

Here is a fairly intense parody of Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart being interviewed for New Moon. Of course, the Robsten rumors get lots of air time–but there’s also an “Exclusive Clip” from New Moon.


--Kitzie

Source: http://www.newmoonmovie.org/2009/06/parody-of-kristen-stewart-and-robert-pattinson-interview/

110 Ways To Annoy Edward Cullen

110 Ways To Annoy Edward Cullen! by ♫♪kєη∂αℓℓd957♪♫ on Polyvore.com

1. Call him Eddy, all the time
2. Give yourself a paper cut and make a point of showing him the blood, then put it in your mouth. Say, “Mmmm, Delicious! Want some?”
3. Say “you don’t look that scary”
4. Use vampire expression like “holy Dracula” and “good bye sweet Transylvania”
5. Visualize yourself naked
6. Ask him to help you do something impossible (save the world, build an atomic clock, help you with your calculus ect). When he has trouble say “never mind, I’m sure Jacob could help me”
7. Drive REALLY slow
8. Volunteer him for a blood drive
9. Hold up a bottle of ketchup and say, “look!! BLOOOOOD OOOOOOOO”
10. Hang posters that say “I support Jacob Black” and “Jacob Black for President” All over his room
11. Throw him to the crazy fan girl hordes.
12. Tie Bella to some railroad tracks. When he gets mad, say, “Wow, a little overprotective, aren’t we? I’m sure Jacob wouldn’t have a problem with this.”
13. Say, “Hey, aren’t you that guy from Harry Potter?”
14. Tell him that Emmet is a cooler vampire than him.
15. Tell him that Jane has the coolest vampire power. Mention that it’s significantly better than mind reading.
16. Continually suggest that he’d be better off eating Bella, rather than dating her.
17. Mention that he isn’t a real vampire.
18. When flying on an airplane, say, “If this plane crashes on an island, we eat Bella first.”
19. Suggest that his life is too stressful. Recommend aromatherapy.
20. When he announces his wedding, say “Why? Is Bella pregnant?”
21. Leave bloody dead animals around him. Insist that you’re helping with the aromatherapy.
22. Invite Jacob’s whole family to the wedding. When he gets mad, say, “I was just trying to help.”
23. Invite the Volturi to the wedding.
24. Make a list of the ways that werewolves are cooler than vampires. Show it to him. Act offended when he gets mad.
25. Tell him that he’s too closed-minded: he needs to welcome people of all cultures into his life.
26. Talk in Ebonics.
27. Tell him to “bear in mind other people’s thoughts.”
28. Kidnap Bella. When he asks where she is, say, “Don’t worry about it.”
29. When he threatens to kill you, say, “Now, now, aren’t we being a little hasty?”
30. When he really is going to kill you, blame Alice. Say she took her to LA to go shopping.
31. Poke him.
32. When he talks about how painful his transformation was, say, “Oh, yeah, your life is soooo hard.”
33. When he talks about how much he loves Bella, say, “Aren’t you a little young to know what love is? Maybe you should wait till you’re a few years older.”
34. Make Bella wear a team Jacob shirt.
35. Suggest that he and Bella take some time off to “see other people.” Recommend Jessica Stanley for him.
36. Run over his Volvo with Bella’s truck.
37. While he’s listening, tell Bella she deserves something better.
38. Invite him to go to the beach with you.
39. Read the back of the Twilight books to him. Bonus points for using a dramatic announcer voice.
40. Blame him for all of Bella’s past injuries.
41. Constantly hint at how good Bella must smell.
42. Visualize his life in 20 years. SUV, suburban house, 12 kids.
43. Laugh when Bella trips. Loudly.
44. Shine a bright light in his face. Say, “Darnit, you didn’t go all sparkly.”
45. Buy a copy of Breaking Dawn on the black market. Tell him he dies at the end.
46. Ask him where he buys his body glitter.
47. Suggest self-tanner.
48. When Bella says how much she loves him, think then why was she making out with Jacob down at La Push yesterday?
49. When he gets mad, innocently say, “I didn’t say anything.”
50. Point out the circles under his eyes. Tell him to get more sleep.
51. Offer to lend him your concealer.
52. Withdraw the offer. Tell him that he’s too pale for this shade.
53. Suggest that a week in the tropics would do him good.
54. Tell him that we’re getting tired of his “scary” act.
55. Redecorate his room in a Care-bear theme.
56. Tell him that it will help him be happy.
57. Buy him a wolf plushie.
58. Turn his piano into a craps table.
59. Suggest that he try harder to make new friends.
60. Tell him that he should hang out with Mike Newton more often.
61. Put pretty bows in his hair while he’s distracted.
62. Tell him that pretending to sleep would make him sympathize with the humans more.
63. Cook delicious-looking meals. When he won’t eat them, get offended. Tell him “I put my sweat and blood into that meal!”
64. Suggest the same stupid plan over and over again. When he gets mad, say, “Well now, who got up on the wrong side of the bed this morning…oh, wait!”
65. Tell him he could up his cool if he went out for football. Or Track.
66. Wear tinfoil on your head. When he asks why, tell him that people are always trying to read your mind.
67. Give yourself a paper-cut in front of Jasper.
68. When he attacks, say, “Bad, dog, down!”
69. Suggest that they keep Jasper in the back yard. “If he can’t be civilized, well…”
70. Push Bella in front of a bus.
71. Pour ketchup on Bella.
72. Ask him to sign your copy of Twilight.
73. Wonder loudly to yourself what The Souls are going to do with the Cullen’s when they invade.
74. Plant daisies in his house.
75. Break all of his CDs.
76. Take Bella shopping. Accidentally leave her at the mall.
77. Crash his wedding.
78. When he plans his wedding, say, “Who’s going to come? You know like four people.”
79. Whenever he comes into the room, start mentally singing the ‘Gilligan’s Island’ theme song.
80. When he tells you to stop, say, “Stop what?”
81. Take all of his CD’s. Replace them with songs from Disney movies.
82. Tell him that he and Bella should go on more ‘real dates.’
83. Ask him if he’s planning on having a vampire attack Bella every spring break. Mention that you know someone who would be willing to help this year.
84. Make a list of reasons why Bella should leave him. Make sure that you have one of them be, “Jacob. Enough said.”
85. Roll in glitter. Run around saying, “Look at me! I’m Edward! I’m Edward!”
86. Write him love poems. Sign them from Jacob.
87. Tell him that it’s perfectly acceptable to be an ‘alternative couple’ with Jacob.
88. Diagram a love triangle: Edward <3>
89. When he plans his wedding, say, “You know, the leading cause of divorce is marrying too young.”
90. Suggest that the Cullen’s have more “family meetings.” Make a point not to invite Bella.
91. Tell Bella that her cooking skills will be wasted if she marries him.
92. Ask him if he’ll still love Bella once she’s a vampire and not clumsy anymore.
93. Give him your Divorce attorney’s card. Tell him it’s “Just in case.”
94. Skip around the house chanting, “Edward and Bella, sitting in a tree.”
95. Diagnose him randomly. “Maybe you have sleep apnea.” “You look anemic. Have you been getting enough red meat?” “Maybe it’s a vitamin D deficiency.” Ask Carlisle to back your suggestions up.
96. Invite small children to his house for ‘scary story time’.
97. Paint his room. Pink.
98. Ask if you’re going to be in the wedding party. Repeatedly. And frequently.
99. Wonder what to get him for a wedding present. “A mattress topper? No, that won’t work. A blender? No, wait…oh! A trip to Hawaii. Oh, never mind…”
100. Wave wooden crosses and strings of garlic at him randomly. When he asks what you’re doing, say, “I know I read this somewhere.”
101. Mail him a llama. When he asks why, say, “Why not?”
102. Don’t think.
103. Buy him a dog. Name it Jacob.
104. Knock on his door and the second he opens it, start singing Christmas carols really loud and off key.

….make sure you do this around Easter.
105. Make him go out with you to a fancy restrant for his Birthday when it isn’t his Birthday. Get all offended when he won’t eat anything. Start crying.
106. Send him love letters and sign them “You dearest Victoria”.
107. lock ... him in a room with Mike, Tyler, Eric, and Jacob. Give everyone except him a picture of Bella. Do the math people.
108. Tell him you think Mike x Bella is a WAY better couple than Edward x Bella. Then tell him that the reason you think that is because Mike and Bella just got married. Run really fast…
109. Force him to read Jacob x Edward slash… over and over and over….
110. Constantly think about kissing Bella.

--Kitzie xoxo

Old Kellan Lutz Interview: Sugar Loaf the Stuffed Leopard

If you missed this Kellan Lutz interview from the Twilight days, be sure to check it out–he chats online and reveals that–

I have many obsessions! Mainly candy haha as well as wild cats like Snow Leopards, Lions, Tigers, all of them, I used to have so many statues around my room growing up as well as stuffed animals. I still have my childhood favorite stuffed animal in my room now in Los Angeles. He is a Snow Leopard named Sugar Loaf. Funny story with the name. I actually won him in one of those crane arcade game that you move around and drop to pick up a stuffed animal. This was around the time when Beanie Babies were blowing up and so I thought every stuffed animals name was on the tag, so I looked for it and the tag said Sugar Loaf. I was like, hmm that’s a strange name for a Snow Leopard but I didn’t want to change it and hurt his feelings. Five minutes later I won a clown fish out of the same machine and I looked for his name and it was also Sugar Loaf… and I thought to myself, okay now that is weird. Long story short I found out that the tag actually wasn’t the animals name but the actual manufacture name, but I kept it anyways for the Leopard. I am a dork I know.

Check out the rest of the hilarious interview at TwilightMoms.

--Kitzie

Source: http://www.newmoonmovie.org/2009/06/old-kellan-lutz-interview-sugar-loaf-the-stuffed-leopard/

Fan Reactions to Watching the Trailer for the First Time

What did you do the first time you saw the first official New Moon trailer? A couple of Twilight fans recorded their reactions upon their first view of the trailer and posted them on YouTube for all to see. Priceless!

Kitzie's Note: i think i was exactly like that--only worse. I was half-crying and half-pulling my hair. I was literally almost going insane. The thing that i was shocked about the most was the fact that i didn't imagine New Moon to be like this. I think, as of right now, based on what we just saw in the trailer, NEW MOON IS GOING TO BE AWESOME!!!!

--Kitzie

Source: http://www.newmoonmovie.org/2009/06/fan-reactions-to-watching-the-trailer-for-the-first-time/

Wicked Edward Cullen Twilight Guitar: Cullitar

Check out this amazing Edward Cullen Twilight inspired guitar for Guitar Hero! NMM.org reader Holly says–

A very good friend of mine who owns a graphic/printing company made me this awesome custom design for my Guitar Hero guitar. He combined two of my loves, Robert Pattinson and Guitar Hero I thought it turned out awesome and I wanted to share it with you. We call it the Cullitar.

How wicked is that? Shred on!

--Kitzie

Source: http://www.newmoonmovie.org/2009/05/wicked-edward-cullen-twilight-guitar-cullitar/

Fan Creates Unique Twilight Mask

Crafty NMM.org reader Rachel M. took a unique approach to arts & crafts and created a Twilight mask–she sculpted this one-of-a-kind mask featuring the symbols found on the front covers of the Twilight Saga boks. Well done, Rachel!

--Kitzie

Source: http://www.newmoonmovie.org/2009/05/fan-creates-unique-twilight-mask/

Funny Video: Cam Gigandet versus Twilight Fans

Cam Gigandet vs. Twilight Fans from Cam Gigandet

Haha! Check out this awesome new FunnyOrDie video featuring Twilight baddie Cam Gigandet in a run-in with some Twilight fans.

And as the video says, vote, vote, and vote again for Twilight in the MTV Movie Awards!

--Kitzie

Source: http://www.newmoonmovie.org/2009/05/funny-video-cam-gigandet-versus-twilight-fans/

Twilite: Parody Novel of Twilight

There’s a new novel that pokes fun in a major way at Stephenie Meyer’s Twilight. Stephen Jenner wrote a full-length spoof of the book. Here’s an excerpt–

The first time Stella sees Edweird Sullen:

I continued to scan the Sullens’ table for another available stud and quickly found one who was nearly as hot as Casper. Again I queried Maria, this time about the youngest Sullen boy, trying to hide my newly-formed schoolgirl crush on him.

“The boy over there, with the perfect face, nose, eyes, and lips…and chiseled chin, broad shoulders, strapping chest and tree trunk arms…and that V-shaped torso, thin waist and muscular legs like that of an Olympic cyclist. And perfectly manicured finger and toenails. Who is he, and what’s his story?”

“Oh, that’s Edweird,” she said, rolling her eyes as if they were the seven and ten pins teetering and deciding whether to fall down or not. “He’s dreamy. But he doesn’t date. Apparently, even the best looking girls in the school are not good enough for him. Rumor has it that he’s only interested in five foot four, average looking dark haired girls who only recently moved to Sporks from a hot climate state beginning with the letter “A.” Go find someone who fits that description!” Maria dejectedly shook her head, the contents of her shot glass riding up and spilling over the sides. She leaned down close to the table, shot out her pink tongue and lapped up the droplets.

I now turned my full attention to Edweird. Edweird looked as though he was transplanted to Sporks from the pages of Greek mythology. He was tall, with long, lean muscles, perfect angular features, and boyish good looks — remarkably like the boy who played Cedric Diggory in the Harry Potter movies, but with spiky hair. That’s all I’m going to tell you about Edweird now, but don’t you worry: I’ll be describing his perfection from this point on every chance I get in four — count ‘em, four — amazingly long (and expensive) books.

Meh. I’ll pass. The humor is a bit too angry for my taste, but I can see the appeal. What are your thoughts? It can be purchased now at Amazon.

--Kitzie

Source: http://www.newmoonmovie.org/2009/05/twilite-parody-novel-of-twilight/